Wednesday, December 1, 2010

YAY! Chemistry Paper 2!

First of all, I'd like to apologise to my dearest mama, Chong Jie Hui.
You told me not to let you see me on blogger, but oh well~

The paper of da day is~ Chemistry paper 2!

Before going for the exam,
I mean the night before, and today morning...
I've been trying to cram all those organic chemistry thingies inside my head.
BIG FAYUL!

When I got the question paper and flipped through it,
well I felt kinda relieved, but really...kinda.
Relieved, because not much of the questions were on organic chemistry. YEAHHH~
BUT....! LOTS of them are from inorganic chemistry.

Speaking of which, I'm amazed by myself. REALLY.
Our form 6 chemistry syllabus consists of 3 parts.
Physical, organic and inorganic.
And to my surprise (and I only found out today),
I don't even have a single book for inorganic! LOL!!!
Can you believe that ?!!

The paper really made me felt like...
I've never learnt anything about chemistry in this past one and a half year. =/
I can merely work out the answers, a little theory and a lot of chui sui. =P

At first I thought I'd be having more than enough time since I predicted I wouldn't have much to write with only this much that I've studied, but it turned out that I was wrong.
I wrote from the first minute 'til the last, and there are still blank spaces on my paper.
Well most of the stuffs were merely made up, but I'm amazed by how far I went merely by my own 'logical' imagination.

When the paper's done...

Naresh : I think I can really fail this time. (He used to tell me that no matter how hard the paper is, it's still unlikely to fail, which I USED TO kinda agree with)
Jian : I only did 3 essay questions. (We're supposed to choose and do 4 out of the 6 questions given)
Sok Kuan : Don't say anymore...! I wanna cry jor... (.....)

We met Puan Wong when we came out from the exam hall.
She asked about how we did, and told us it shouldn't be a problem after giving the question paper a quick glance.
Well personally I wouldn't really say her appearance as comforting, as she kept saying
'Okay arh.. should be able to do'
while we were still thinking
'Die lorh.. so hard dunno do'
while handing up the answer sheets.

And I noticed a difference in the responses when we left the exam hall between today and yesterday.
Yesterday after the Biology paper, people came out of the exam hall and start going
'Cham lorh.. dunno do..'
Today after the Chemistry paper, people came out of the exam hall and...
Silence!

Notty's Theory of Post-Exam-Responses :
Dunno do = Know
Silence = Don't know
=D

Seriously, I really couldn't bring myself to grieve upon how badly I did in the paper.
Probably because I didn't really pay as much efforts to them as the others.
But I'm glad, because I really don't hope that there'll come a day when I'm crying over my results because they sucked =S

There's still another paper up tomorrow, Biology paper 1.
Let's hope that everyone's in a not-too-bad mood tomorrow and are able to do well.
Best of luck, everyone!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

18th November 2010

昨晚明明就跟自己讲好了,明早九点半醒来读书。
是啊… 闹钟响了… 的确九点半就醒了。
可是… 一整天就只是做在电脑前面按按按按按!

早上起来就开始玩FF7…
好不容易升了十多个level,尽然突然整个游戏crash掉!
哇… 我那不懂打了多久的心机统统泡汤了!
不要紧… 心想,考完STPM再搞定你!

之后又换打另一个flash游戏,
The World's Hardest Game
基本上就是一个有很多不同颜色的圆形和正方形的游戏。
听起来还真的蛮白痴的,但其实也还不错。
至少能让我玩上至少两个下午了。
刺激时还可以自己跟自己尖叫、自己跟自己傻笑…
连坐我旁边在打机的哥哥也顶我不顺~

死死死死死死 过关!
死死死死死死死死死死死死 又过关!
玩啊玩… 午餐时间到了!
吃饱,继续!
继续死啊死… 也不记得死了多少百次…
终于玩到22/30,还是过不到…

呵呵,死到dulan了… 猜我做了些什么?
没错! 又继续打FF7!
哇劳~ 刚刚不是才跟自己说要考完试才搞定它的咩?!
现在想回也真的是有够顶自己不顺!
!%&$(@!$#

吃晚餐过后还继续!够力咯!
玩到十点多,都差不多十一点了!甘愿咯!
到现在还在po废话,真的是!!!

李永康啊… 不要酱懒了行吗?
拜托你… 就勤劳那一个月会死啊?
再不“生性”一点,这两年就等于白挨了!
明明自己就是知道的…
可是就是没干劲… 犯贱到!!!

明天再不读书就叫妈妈封杀自己整个月不用碰电脑!
这是你自己说的…… 记住啊白痴!

Monday, November 15, 2010

Farewell, my dearest Sulaiman

Today's the last day at school, practically, mainly because I don't think anyone would be going to school tomorrow, which is the OFFICIAL last school day for 2010.
I've actually struggled, whether to go or not.
I'd think of taking a stroll 'round the school, well for one last time ya?
I get to have a few hours walking 'round the school without interference, and recall my memories by looking back at the footsteps which I've left together with my friends.

S.M.K. Sulaiman... A school that I've been in, for 7 years.
Come to think of it, if it weren't for Xuan's father's help, I wouldn't be able to study in this school either, because I was originally dispatched to Ketari.
Well I guess I really owe him a proper thanks, for what he had helped me ain't solely a transfer, but a chance for me to have AWESOME people like you all as my friends!
So...thanks 表姨丈~

First day to school... I was still that boy with over-sized head and 'pet头'... Exactly the way I was in primary school, 'cept for the uniform.
We, the 1st formers, were made to spend a few days in Dewan Makan.
I couldn't really recall whom I've noticed in there, only lotsa different faces whom I don't know. Well, bet they didn't know who was I back then either. =P
There, I could only recall befriending Gao (I choose to call you this, 'cause it makes me feel our relationship is better this way, but sorry if it upsets you), where we played with each other. How? By pinching each other.

Then I was in 1 Dedikasi. There were Jie Hui, Woon and Sam. Did I miss out anyone? Sorry but these were all that I could recall. (My memory's been failing me lately)
I remembered back then, Woon and Sam used to always pick on me. But I couldn't really remember how, and unbelievably I had no hard feelings on them.
I sat with Jie Hui, we were kinda close back then.
We talked about everything... I think there were people addressed like ah-Sa and ah-Sh... Stuffs like that~ Can you recall? LOL!

When it reached mid-year, some of us from Dedikasi got 'promoted' to 1 Cekal.
There I met and made friends with more Chinese. (sorry if I sounded racist but I don't recall having any friends of the other races back then... Awww!)
There you all are, all of you 'cept for a few who moved in later.
I think I've already been sitting with Sam since form 1, if I've not mistaken.
And we've made a bottle of...well, mixtures of whatever-you-can-think-of. I can still recall the bottle is a green 7-up bottle. LOL!

Then, I also get to know some people from among the 4th and 5th formers.
I idolised one of them...(well maybe there's more there is to that, but who cares? XD) and made pretty good friends (I guess?) with the others, like Fei Mao, Chun Choy, Ken and etc~
These people are the so-called gangsters in the school, and there was even once when Puan Chan found out I was walking with one of them and asked me if they were bullying me. It's hilarious, but I really appreciate teachers like her who cares so much 'bout their students.
Well...dreams don't last. End of da story!

I also recalled making fun of Hui Yee and Lien Chen. Always saying that they were a couple and stuff, and da 'frog' nickname had already been with Lien Chen since then. @@"
Back then I was only close with some of you. Ho Dan and Sheep back then were still complete strangers to me, who are always not around during Chinese class.
Speaking of Chinese class, 黄义(sorry I don't know how to write)... 螳螂拳!And...ponteng!

In form 2, I sat with Sam throughout the year I think, in the seats up front on the left.
Jie Hui was behind us...and who sat beside her? OMG I forgot! =.=" well sorry to whoever you are? mind reminding me? LOL!
I made friends with more of the people in the class.
I remember I used to be one of the crew members of the girls' gang. There were Jie Hui, Siu Shan, Hui Yee, Foong and me, if I'm not wrong.
We used to make all the noise while tuition'ing at Puan Wong's place, remember? XD

Wei moved to Sulaiman from Ketari, but didn't make it into Cekal.
Leong went to Dedikasi due to his car accident.
Pretty much like that.
Nothing BIG happened, 'cept that Jian cheated off me and made me jump off Block J from the 2nd floor. I landed on my butt! Screw you Jian!
All in all, earlier half of the year was so-so and started to turn into a nightmare later on.

Moving onto form 3...
Leong and Woon got promoted AGAIN to Cekal.
They were always fighting with each other at the back of the class.
I sat with Gian that time, Ho Dan and Lien Chen in front of us.

I was already pretty good friends with Wei, Gian and Cheong.
I still recalled hanging out with them at Hot Wok, talking about stuffs.
Then there was Cheong's birthday incident, which pissed off most of the guys.
And ever since then, we celebrated Thailand's new year, 泼水节 with Cheong quite often that year. I've gotta apologise to Cheong. We never should've done that to you. But what's done is done and it's part of the memory between all of us ya?

I've already been quite into online games that time.
And it turned out that my first relationship was ruined because of that.
I'd like to apologise to you...for whatever I've done to you. Am not sure if you care if I addressed you by your name, so I chose not to. =D

Then there was PMR, which strangely, I had no memory about it.

Then came, the sweetest part of my secondary school life. Form 4 and Form 5...
The year began off with some lectures about deciding whether to go for Science or Arts stream. (and I'm sorry but I had pretty much no memories with the arts students)
Ho Dan, Sheep, Gian, Wei and Woon almost didn't get into Beta, but alas they got in with the help of Puan Wong, the counselor.

In Beta, the boys sure get outta control at times.
We fight, we shout, we ponteng, we 'lihat sebelah' during exams.

During recess time, Gian, Ho Dan and me will be off to our respective STATIONS.
I'll be buying the 料s, Gian'll be buying the rice whereas Ho Dan'll be buying the drinks.
After eating, there'll always be ice-cream sessions. There were Apple Sour, Twister and 喷精... and the namelist for buying ice-cream had stayed on K for the 2 years! LOL!
Our gang could sit in the canteen all day, and have endless topics to talk about everyday!
Some of the few who are more 'obedient' will be heading back to class when the ball rang, but there were this 'Main Six' whom will never be on time returning to class. I'm not sure quite sure, but I think they were Woon, Wei, Pong, Gian, Ho Dan and me. (hope I'm not wrong)

In the morning, we'll always see the same scenes.
Pong lending reports from people to copy. We'll borrow from him later on XD
Gian will be sleeping. He'll be awake by recess. It's a bit unfair and of a miracle, that practically no teacher scolded him for sleeping, but not the others. Why is he the exception, eh?
Others? Maybe copying homeworks, or slacking off...chatting~
When teachers are not around, we'll be forming groups and begin gossiping...
Sometimes, the gossiping turns louder and louder and begin to become a disturbance to Alpha. XD
Usually Woon'll be the one talking the most and the others are just listening to his blabbering =P

Gian, Ho Dan, Pong and me formed kinda like a gang of ourselves.
We sat together in a corner of the class, and we'll be talking about games ALL DAY.
We were indulged in MoSiang that time ('cept for Ho Dan).
Sheep will always be sitting there. He appears to be listening to the teacher, but actually he isn't. He's practically just sitting there, doing nothing.
Woon will be running 'round the class, disturbing people.
Wei...well I couldn't recall what exactly he's doing the whole time. =P
Jian, Lien Chen and Cheong formed the more hardworking groups of the class.
The other Malay and Indian classmates were...well all minding their own business. We're cool with each other =) and I'm not racist!

Then there were also cases like Woon pretending to be crippled while going into Physics lab. Come to think of it, up 'til now I still don't get what is the purpose of doing so.
We sat in the class and didn't go for Biology class, and got caught by Mariani. And we were made to finish up our notes in the corridor. WE'RE THE FIRST ONES TO HAVE EVER SAT THERE DOING HOMEWORK, SO BE PROUD!
Mr. Chow locked the door of the lab, and we didn't give a damn and went back to class.
Woon scaring off Rokiah, and Rokiah threw a duster at Wei.
The 'ChaoHai' teacher who taught us Mathematics who was so happy when we passed up our homework for once in the whole year, together!

Then also cases of icebergs forming 'round Pong.
It was only with Sam back then from form 3.
Then began with Gian, then Ho Dan and me...then Sheep.
I really didn't mean it, really. I couldn't even recall what was it that made me feel so sick of him. And it's freakin' stupid to lose a friend over something that you couldn't even recall. Well, for me it is.

While having SPM, they all had lunch at my place.
It was an offer from my mum, and they found it hard to turn her down. @@" I guess?
Yes, even the period of having SPM, I was enjoying myself.
We even purposely went to Mentakab (was it?) by car on the last day to have Pizza.

I could really talk all day about our lives in the class.
I had fun along the 2 whole years. I felt like having TRUE friends.
We always did things together, be it CRAZY or be it MEANINGLESS.
It was the climax of my school life.

Then came the PLKN, followed by the crossroad of our lives where we diverged on different paths of our own.
To tell the truth, I never ever planned on any other paths other than taking form 6.
And I thought the others were thinking the same, (which is why I'm doing this summary now, and not back when form 5 ended because I thought it wasn't the end yet) which made me feel kinda sad when it turned out that I was wrong.
MOST of the friends were planning on taking courses in colleges.
Only a few of us were left in school to take form 6.

Everything was like started off brand new.
The subjects... The syllabus... The teachers... The class...
We started off from around 15 at the beginning, and the number began to deplete until there were only 7 of us.
Never had I imagined that I would be studying in a class with this few people.
There were teachers claiming that this will make studying more efficient, which I think is so damn NOT true! Man, the class is such a joke with so few people and how could we be in the mood to study? Well, but then we still made it and it turned out to be not as bad as I imagined.

I'd like to deliver my thanks to mainly Jian and Naresh, but also the others in my class.
You guys had made me survive through my form 6 life.
It could've been much worse if it weren't for you all, so you guys really have my thanks!
Though I may not seem so, I really appreciate the company that you guys had given me.

Jian and Naresh, you guys had really changed me. I could talk about shits all day long now, thanks to the one and a half year training you both gave me. But still, talking shits with you guys were cool, though the shits were always about DotA...and ADULT issues. =.=" I suppose we'd still be see'ing each other often so I won't say much, but you guys are great friends! You gave me support and taught me things as well, and as much as I doesn't seem like it and tells you both to get away from me, I like you both pretty much! <3
Sok Kuan, I wasn't really even a friend to you back when in form 5. But when I get to know you, you're pretty nice. You're violent at times, but still a nice person. You're the one who interact with us, the guys most all these times. Sorry you had to bear with all our nasty shit talks, but I'm glad you didn't find us annoying (I think?). You should really broaden your horizons, meet more people, make more friends. =)
Siew Jin, we've been through our WHOLE school life together. It's true, there'd be times when we were like complete strangers to each other, that we didn't even bother to greet when we passed by each other. I know that you're a nice person, but you should express your feelings a little more (in my opinion) because it's like we know too little about you. And you'll make people have a feeling that they're bothering you when you don't speak.
Saras and Sook Khoon, not much I can say to both of you. I interact the least with you gurls, but I just wanna thank you both from the bottom of my heart. You've made my form 6 life a sweeter memory to be recalled.

As for the people whom I met in the other classes, you guys are great as well! I could enjoy myself hearing to the chatters and laughters in Cekal, even if I had nothing to do with it. It made me feel so...human, and that's the way a class should be! It reminds me of things...that can keep me moving on. And I'd love to thanks you all for that! But it's a regret that we didn't get to know each other better, and as for the others who used to be in Sulaiman, that we've gotten a little distant compared to we used to be.

I also cherish the moments in choir and the friends I made in there like bboY, Max, Bunny and the young, little lower form girls.
We went out for competitions, and I'd also learned things throughout my journeys with them.
Teamworks... Leaderships... and how we should cherish each and every single moment we share with people...because things can really feel so GREAT this moment, but sucks big time the next.
I wish the club all the best! and the same goes for each and every single member of the club as well!

Sulaiman...
You've been something which I've always wanted to avoid, as much as I can.
But then...now that I'm about to leave you...it really made me feel kinda sad.
The things that had happened to me, while I'm with you...
The changes in me that you've witnessed all along... From a kid til now...
The friends I've made... yes, with your help... be it students or teachers...
My secondary school life...and the memories within it... It is shared between you and me.
I know that I've done almost nothing for the school, but at least...

At least...allow me to say for the first and the last time...
I love you, Sulaiman!
Farewell...my dearest Sulaiman!

Friday, November 12, 2010

12th November 2010

I have no idea what is up with me, but I woke up at 10am sharp today.
Which is...kinda late. =( Geeez~

Well...everything's the same for today.
Eat —> Play —> Eat —> Play... and it goes on and on~

I've finally finished ALL the videos of RWJ.
A sudden idea of commenting on his video flashed through my mind, but oh well...it was just for a short fragment of seconds. =)

I'm now on a quest of finish all the facts on OMG Facts.
I'm kinda close, there's around 200+ pages there and I'm currently at 135th page.
There really are lotsa awesome stuffs in there, like the inverted Google and Google gravity pages.

My brother came back today, which he always does every Friday. (FYI, he's working in KL)
Well, that means I can no longer do whatever I want...umm...to be exact, I can't PPS that often now that he's around since he'll be sharing the line with me and he plays online games...
Oh and I didn't watch the 3rd episode of LOTR today.
It's not that I forgot about it, just...didn't feel like it.
You know, I'm a person that practically follows my feelings while doing things~

There's this note that I've been tagged in Facebook by one of my classmates, Siew Jin.
Well, it's mainly about how complicated her feelings are right now.
She's busy preparing for her exams, yet she couldn't suppress her feelings about these one and a half years of form-six-life.
I wasn't sure that I was one of those being thanked in the post until I was tagged.
Seriously, well for me, I felt that we were merely ordinary friends, though we've known each other for a surprisingly long time...13 years!
Well, she'd done a lot of things for me too ya? So if you ever sees this Siew Jin, I'd like to thank you too, for everything you've done and taught me.

Apparently tomorrow's MUET for the other 3 papers.
So let's wish all those who are taking the test luck ya! All the best~
Hope there'll be someone among my friends getting band 6~
That way at least, I will feel proud!
I can go around and tell people like 'hey you know what? that guy's my friend!'

Seriously, there's nothing much to talk about today.
But there's this moment when I came across a song while browsing through the links shared by my friends on facebook, that I felt moisture in my eyes all of a sudden without really anything in my mind.
So I guess something's up inside of me and even I, myself is not aware of it, even now.
Maybe I've really been keeping things from myself for too long, be it studies or relationship problems.

Notty, get a move on!

Thursday, November 11, 2010

11th November 2010

I woke up around 10 today, to my surprise.
Usually I'd be up before 10 at most, no matter how late I went to bed.
And it's obvious, I decided to skip school for today, that's why my mum didn't wake me.
Partly because of the boring school day yesterday, and partly because none of my classmates were going.

I facebooked a little, while having my breakfast.
Checking through my friends' posts, I noticed that the results for UPSR were coming out today.
I went downstairs to tell my mum about it, so she could go calling her friends and relatives about their children's results. (like she always do)

And today, to my surprise yet again, I decided to start tweeting. =)
Well, it's really a good place to spam.
It's a place where you can tell the world what you're doing, even if your posts may not mean anything to anyone.
You just feel good telling it...well, to someone I guess?
I noticed that there were a lot of friends whom I've never expected to see on Twitter, that are actually tweeting kinda actively.

After trying out the features on Twitter, I decided to watch a movie.
"Lord of The Rings II — The Two Towers"
It's a good movie, about triumph and failure and all, I suppose? XD
The movie's a little too long, over 3 hour and half!
I even had to stop in the middle of it to grab my lunch.
The movie ended with a mutated Hobbits called Smeagol casting his evil thoughts of killing Frodo, the ring bearer.
So, I guess the third episode will be on my 'Movie of The Day' list tomorrow. =P

Nothing much happened today.
All I did was sitting in front of my computer, and strolling around the house.
Had some small talks with my mother and sister, played with my dog.

Dinner today sucked. =(
I went out with my parents, to a stall which we rarely went to.
It's not a new stall, or rather it's rather kinda old.
It's just that its appearance had kept us from it all the time.
And today, we've decided to give it a try, which we regretted.

Today's just another same boring day.
Me, spending off my time~ Doing nothing~
I should really be getting my lazy ass moving and start studying now.
Wouldn't want to waste 2 years of my life for nothing by getting sucky results in STPM.

Oh ya and I found myself this cool website called OMG Facts!
It's a cool site with lotsa fun and interesting facts in it to discover, so be sure to check it out ya?

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

10th November 2010

Today, I woke up at around 6 something in the morning~
Well, rather than wake up, 'my mother woke me up' would be a lot more precise. XD
I then had my every-morning-routines :
Bath —> Dress Up —> Facebook for a little while —> A nice cup of tea —> Off to school!

I parked my car and walked to my classroom.
The same faces, as usual...just that Sok Kuan was absent today.
(Heard that she's sick, let's hope she gets well soon!)

The only actual class that we've had today was PA2.
The rest of the classes? Well...
Chemistry periods passed kinda unexpectedly easily with 4 structure question exercises.
Mathematics periods...well I pretty much slept through it.
MUET teacher didn't came in...not exactly a surprise.

Then there is this Majlis that was meant for us, the sixth-formers.
This should be the first ceremony ever held specially for us.
Heard that it was because some schools in the other states did, so our school most probably just followed, not wanting to lose.
At least that's what I think? LOL!
The admins delivered their speeches (God, they sure took their time!) and we can finally start eating.
The crowd at the dishes made my friends and I decide to wait.
Just when we went over to the dishes to take ours, guess what? Nothing left!
Actually the dishes should be enough for all of us, just that some inconsiderate people took extra, I guess.
Well, since there's nothing left to eat, I headed out for TomYam with Jian and Dan.

It was practically an ordinary lunch with friends, nothing much.
We had some talks about random stuffs, which I couldn't recall anymore.
Well, there's this one incident that Dan shared with us that I can recall.
But too bad it's a secret of his, so I cannot share it here =P

After the lunch, I went to photocopy some notes I've got from my friends.
And I'm supposed to read them up for my coming STPM.
But guess what? I'm not exactly in the mood to study...just yet.

After that I headed over to Sok Kuan's house to return her notes, and also to check on how she's doing.
Too bad, she was having her nap when I arrived at her house, and I didn't get to return her the notes.

I headed home. Had another cup of tea and a slice of cake.
Facebook time...again! Checked on my Barn Buddy and stuffs.
Then I took a nap, from around 5 something to 8 something.

I wouln't have waken up if it's not for my sister's yelling about something going wrong with her recently-permed-hair.
I went to check on her with my half-closed eyes, only to notice her crying about it.
I was still too sleepy to react to anything, and went to bath and had my dinner.

Then I went back to face my computer.
Watched "Home Alone 2", facebooked a little.
Suddenly a strong feeling came to me that I decided to blog (that's what I'm doing now).
I couldn't tell for sure, just felt like it that's all.
Since this is my blog, I can treat it however I want yea?
Even to treat it as my diary.

Well, today, for me, is just another plain old day.
The same daily routines...with no surprise and all.
Seriously, STPM is really just around the corner, but I can't seem to feel any pressure coming from it.
The first paper is on 23rd of November and it's like less than 2 weeks from now!
But...oh well, just lemme slack a little while longer okay? :S

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

死了的友谊 无止境的等待

曾几何时的我们是那么的要好。
那时的你就仿佛是我的明灯… 在你的照耀下,我毫无忧虑。

然而我们何时开始变了?
我不知道…

你对我突如其来的不理不睬,让我不知所措。
我问、我追、我求、我泣…
任凭我做的一切一切,你都视而不见。

我做错了什么吗?为什么你不理我了?
…… ……
我们到底出了什么问题? 别吓我…告诉我… 好不好?
…… ……
我们的友谊…难道就这样让一个不值得你一提的问题考倒了?
…… ……
好… 既然你已经放弃了,我也不必继续自讨苦吃。

就这样… 我们见到彼此时,仿佛变成了两个陌生人。
每一次擦肩而过,我的心都觉得好痛… 好痛…
不甘心!
明明我们曾经是那么的要好…
明明我们曾经是彼此的知己…
不公平!
你要我死也得让我知道原因啊!
你这样叫我怎么死得心甘情愿啊!

这样的关系… 也不懂维持了多久。
一年……
两年……
不,至今应该超过四年了吧?

真讽刺…
明明就过了那么久!
然而,这几年来你做任何一些能让我觉得仿佛有希望的事都让我那已经静止的心泛起莲漪…
明明放弃就是你的决定!
然而,这几年来受苦的仿佛就只有我一个人而已…

都过了那么久… 我还在等些什么?
答案? 现在还有意义吗? 已经没有啦!
那你为什么还一直在等?!
已经过了那么久… 连原因都还搞不清楚,还期望什么?

理智一直的告诉自己,不要在奢望什么了…
然而自己却不听使唤的注意他…
理智不断的告诉自己,不要再傻了…
然而自己却不自觉的还等着他…

等着… 等着…
差不多第五年了啦? 哈……!