死了的友谊 无止境的等待

曾几何时的我们是那么的要好。
那时的你就仿佛是我的明灯… 在你的照耀下，我毫无忧虑。

然而我们何时开始变了？
我不知道…

你对我突如其来的不理不睬，让我不知所措。
我问、我追、我求、我泣…
任凭我做的一切一切，你都视而不见。

我做错了什么吗？为什么你不理我了？
…… ……
我们到底出了什么问题？ 别吓我…告诉我… 好不好？
…… ……
我们的友谊…难道就这样让一个不值得你一提的问题考倒了？
…… ……
好… 既然你已经放弃了，我也不必继续自讨苦吃。

就这样… 我们见到彼此时，仿佛变成了两个陌生人。
每一次擦肩而过，我的心都觉得好痛… 好痛…
不甘心！
明明我们曾经是那么的要好…
明明我们曾经是彼此的知己…
不公平！
你要我死也得让我知道原因啊！
你这样叫我怎么死得心甘情愿啊！

这样的关系… 也不懂维持了多久。
一年……
两年……
不，至今应该超过四年了吧？

真讽刺…
明明就过了那么久！
然而，这几年来你做任何一些能让我觉得仿佛有希望的事都让我那已经静止的心泛起莲漪…
明明放弃就是你的决定！
然而，这几年来受苦的仿佛就只有我一个人而已…

都过了那么久… 我还在等些什么？
答案？ 现在还有意义吗？ 已经没有啦！
那你为什么还一直在等？！
已经过了那么久… 连原因都还搞不清楚，还期望什么？

理智一直的告诉自己，不要在奢望什么了…
然而自己却不听使唤的注意他…
理智不断的告诉自己，不要再傻了…
然而自己却不自觉的还等着他…

等着… 等着…
差不多第五年了啦？ 哈……！

First Listening Test in My Life!

Today, I had my first Listening test (MUET) in my life!

Bah.. It wasn't really THAT exciting~

When I went into the language lab, I was kinda nervous..

(Will it be VERY hard? Let's hope it won't..)

And then after we're given the question papers for a minute of reading, START!

I was really relieved, because it didn't come out as the worst that I've expected!

Rather than that, it was kinda easy and I managed to finish much of the questions in Part 1~

I even took the time to fool around with Naresh at the other corner of the language lab~

It seems that he too, had no problem with it~

And then, there goes the Part 2~

This time, it wasn't as easy as the first part..

But still, I was able to get the answers at the second swap~

But when we entered the hind part of Part 2, I felt like dropping into the hell from heaven!

Oh my gosh! I can't even get a single answer out of the 3 passages read for the 6 questions!

And just when I'm trying to recall what I've listened just now..

Teacher: "Alright, one minute's up! I will play the recording for the second time."

....................

I didn't even have the time to get frustrated with the short one minute!

I quickly bent down and tried my best to listen for the answers.

Unfortunately, I still got none of it~ ( Awww... =( )

Alas, I simply wrote down some answers for the questions that make me feel pissed just reading them and handed up the answer sheet.

I was kinda 'down' when I went out of the language lab...

Then, my friends all crowded up and started going like:

Naresh: "Sick mou? Sick mou? Ngor sick sai ark~ Wakaka!"
Jian: "Nei zhong xiu dek choot? Question 5 tong 6 nei dup chore jor ark~ Hahah!"
Naresh: "Bin dou yao? Diu nei meh..."
Jian: "Question 5 tong 6 hai 3 words jer hou mou~"
Naresh: "Hai meh? Diu lor.. Chore 7 jor.. Wakakak!"

It is then only did I realise, it was only me who took this test too seriously.. = ="

This is just an ordinary monthly test, dear~

Stupid me! Ha!

都是因为我爱你

当你在我附近的时候
我总会觉得很不自在
当你跟我说话的时候
我会不知所措，心里又是紧张、又是开心
当我生你气时，只要你跟我说任何一句话
我的怒气就会变成了一种无法形容的喜悦

我总会令自己显得不在乎你
但当你离开了我的视线
我又会不自觉地寻找你的踪迹

当我从远处望见你
我会犹豫是否该上前打声招呼
当我在你视线范围内
我会故意做一些小动作来引起你的注意

在你的面前，我总会让自己显得无知、天真
感觉上，这样你会多关心我一点
感觉上，这样你会更照顾我一些

你的言行举止就是我的喜怒哀乐
当你高兴时，我会笑起来
当你和别人要好时，我会吃醋
当你沮丧时，我会不开心
当你和我玩乐时，我会很满足

即使和你谈的永远都是来来去去的那几句
即使知道你心里的我是那么的渺小
即使我永远都不可能和你在一起
即使你常敷衍我、不怎么理我
我会永远永远地守候在你身边

你开心，我会陪你开心
你难过，我会上前慰问你
你遇难，我会向你伸出援手
你没空，我会闪一边、不防碍你

我不喜欢在我身边出现的任何一些变化
但我却非常向往我们的关系能够再变一些

我希望我可以是你的全部
我希望你的世界里只有我
我希望我能和你一直在一起
我希望我们不会有分开的一天
即使我再怎么清楚我们是多么的没可能
我也会一直抱着这些希望耐心等待着

我会为你付出我的一切
我愿意为你抛弃我的所有
只要是你想的、你要的
只要能令你满足的、开心的
我都会尽我所能去完成你的愿望

因为··· 我爱你

Loneliness

I feel so cold. With no friends around me, I feel....so cold.
I feel that I cannot catch up with you all.
I feel that I've lost track of you all.

I'm all alone, always.
You'll all leave me behind one day.
Leaving me behind, ignoring my existence.
I'm shouting behind there...
But you all are still marching forward at such speed that it's way too much for me to catch up.

I wanted you all by my side.
Just chatting with me would be good enough.
But you all aren't...

Only one thing surrounded me...
The thing that I'm afraid of the most — Loneliness
I feel that I cannot breathe in the midst of loneliness.
I struggled, but it was totally useless.

No one gave me a hand.
No one ever tried to pull me out, help me!
Absolutely no one...